


Second Chance

by jongsoon



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Angst and Romance, Drummer Nakamoto Yuta, F/M, First Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:53:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22898326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jongsoon/pseuds/jongsoon
Summary: When Yuta realized that his decision did more harm than good, asking for a second chance was his only option.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Nakamoto Yuta, Lee Taeyong/Reader, Nakamoto Yuta/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Second Chance

It was another ordinary night for her: on her bed, drowning herself into the reading materials for the next day's class with a playlist of her favorite rock band playing on repeat through her bluetooth speaker. Yes, you read it correctly. In fact, she couldn't study without such an intense noisy melody while most people usually went with at least an R&B tune. It's weird, she knew it clearly. But she's been living that way since she was still a middle school student.

Her phone dinged, notifying her that she had just received a new message.

The highlighter she had been holding in the past hour was half thrown across her bed, expressing her annoyance at herself who was easily distracted by her phone as she was tempted to check it.

An unwanted name flashed on the upper most of her notifications list. She took a deep breath, bracing herself for whatever the person said in the message, before opening it.

" _ **Hi. How are you?**_ "

She somehow regretted her decision to open the message, thinking to herself that she should've just ignored it at the first place. Yet, a part of her couldn't help to act like nothing had happened between her and the person.

She was deleting what she had typed when another message came in.

" _ **Are you free tomorrow? I'll be in town.**_ "

Her heart skipped a beat. It's the same message he had sent her last time which then resulted in their first meeting a month before. She sighed knowing it's another obvious defeat: she wanted to meet him again.

" _Why?_ " she replied with one word which actually not directed towards any of his messages, but his sudden disappearance which confused her.

" _ **Can we meet?**_ " he straight away proposed, not wasting any time to beat around the bush anymore.

" _After lunch. I'll pick you up at the usual place if you agree._ " She bit her lower lip, unsure with what she actually wanted.

" _ **Sure, I'll be there at 2. See you tomorrow.**_ "

She tried to calm herself down knowing that she's going to meet him again, the guy who disappeared after their first 'date' without any notice. No bad experience, no fights, nothing. He just vanished like the date never even happened. She felt stupid for letting him in again, but deep inside she wanted to figure out what actually happened to him after their very first encounter. No, deep inside she actually still had feelings on him.

* * *

It all started two months before. Same setting.

She was busy doing her assignments when a message popped on her phone's screen. Lee Taeyong, her high school best friend, sent her a message out of nowhere after months of no contact at all. He was busy, she knew. Their interactions had been limited after they went to different university although it's only about an hour away from each other. Sparing their free time had become a hassle ever since. Nonetheless, that didn't make them stopped acknowledging each other as one of their best friends.

" _ **Hey. What's up?**_ "

She frowned at the unexpected message from him. " _Wow, a surprise message from the busiest man,_ " she replied.

" _ **Hahaha just thinking about you. Are you dating anyone yet?**_ "

" _You never contacted me and when you do you're just asking if I have a boyfriend? Gosh,_ " she couldn't help to laugh at his straightforward question.

" _ **So? Yes or no?**_ " he persistently repeated his question.

" _If you're my best friend, you know the answer already._ "

" _ **Who knows university life changed you hahaha**_ ," he quipped. " _ **My friend is interested in you**_."

Her first response at his another straightforward message was a loud laugh. " _Me? Really? Are you drunk?_ "

" _ **No, seriously. When he asked me, you crossed through my mind so I just told him about you and he's interested. He wants to talk to you. Can he?**_ "

She was stunned reading his message, thinking about the best way she should reply him.

But Taeyong couldn't stand her leaving him on read even for a minute. An incoming call from him flashed on her phone right away.

"What?" she raised her tone straight away, annoyed by his impatience.

" _So? Can he? Please, he's begging me. No, he starts to annoy me now._ "

She sighed knowing there's no way she could reject him, and he himself knew it. "Fine."

His childish laugh could be heard from across the line. " _Thanks! He's messaging you. Please reply him, okay? Or else he will bother me again. He's a nice guy, don't worry. His name is Yuta._ "

As Taeyong said, it only took Yuta a few seconds to contact her, apparently he was all ready to press send button once Taeyong ended the call.

It was weird. It was her first time having someone explicitly saying he's interested in her before they even got to talk or meet in person. That was the moment she thought Taeyong would be a great salesperson after such an achievement. Yuta had never even met her once and Taeyong's words were enough for him to declare it.

It was weirder when there's no awkwardness between her and Yuta once they started to talk through messages despite the fact she had already known his motives. They clicked right away, thanks to the same favorite band they shared.

" _ **Taeyong said you play piano.**_ "

She couldn't help to smile at herself knowing that there's actually someone who cared about her hobby. " _Well, I'm actually surprised he remembers. I don't play much nowadays._ "

" _ **Why? I'd like to see you play sometime.**_ "

" _Study takes up all the free time I got hahaha_ ," she replied. " _Do you play too?_ "

" _ **I'm the drummer in my band.**_ "

That's how she got more attracted to him after since. She's interested in him.

It only took about a week until they finally got to talk in person. She offered to pick him up at the station not far from her place since most of the time she'd rather drive. It would be more convenient for Yuta to travel the distance by train too, she thought.

He was there waiting for her, wearing a black t-shirt and jeans, having his backpack slung over one shoulder, and wearing a cap backwards.

"Hi," Yuta greeted her once he hopped into the passenger seat. "You want me to drive?"

"Hi. No need, it's okay, you're the guest for today," she smiled back. "So, where should we go?"

"Anywhere, you choose," he replied. His gaze pinned on her, secretly smiling on his own. He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

She grinned. "To be honest, I don't go out that much. Do you have any idea?"

"There's a nice pancake place in a mall not far from here. It's quiet too. You want?"

She glanced at him. "Are you sure you're Japanese? You're more eligible to be a local than me."

"Well, I go downtown often too," he laughed.

The short drive was fulfilled with their laughter as they talked about lots of things. In fact, he was the one who made her laugh with his jokes most of the time. His face beamed whenever he saw her laughing happily. As if it's contagious, he couldn't help to smile and laugh along.

They were walking towards the shop later when she reflexively twined her arm around his, surprising him with such a gesture. He turned towards her, couldn't believe that the person whom Taeyong said was shy could boldly make a move.

Following Yuta's confused gaze that fell on their twined arms, she hastily pulled her arm off of him.

"Oh! I'm sorry!" she immediately apologized, worried that she had made him uncomfortable. "It's my reflex. I always do that when I walk with Taeyong," she chuckled. "I'm sorry I didn't realize it."

Yuta smiled in reply. "I don't mind," he replied and took her arm to twine his again. "It feels good."

They continued talking as they waited for their orders to come out. Yuta chose to sit next to her, which she didn't expect it at first. Well, more like she had no idea on how people usually date, she thought it's rather a norm to sit across each other.

Yuta himself couldn't stop staring at her, still. He gently placed his hand on her thigh as he listened to her speaking before he asked if she's uncomfortable with it.

She politely flashed a smile. "It's okay." At that moment she was thinking to herself whether she'd been hypnotized by his sparkling eyes and healing smile. _But again, who wouldn't?_ she silently asked in her mind.

Nothing went wrong in their first date. She dropped him off back at the station, bid him goodbye, and they continued talking through messages. Everything was normal until he stopped contacting her a week after. No reason, totally nothing.

* * *

"Hi," greeted him as he got into her car, nothing changed from their last encounter.

"Hi," she replied quickly, flashing a smile before turning her focus back on the road. No, she just tried not to make that much eye contact with him.

She could catch him taking a quick scan at her from the corner of her eyes before looking outside the window. The first different gesture from their first meeting when he used to be that immersed in watching her every single move.

"Bad day, huh?" she sneered at his cracked phone screen as he used it, trying to find something to talk about other than their uncertainty.

He snorted, "When your good intention didn't get proper blessings."

"What happened?" she casually asked without looking at him.

"I was helping Taeil, our vocalist, to get back to his dorm last night after we went out for a drink with the band. You know, he's always been weak with alcohol," he shrugged. "He nearly fell off the stairs. Luckily I managed to catch him, but my phone sacrificed itself."

She forced a laugh in response. "Did Taeyong join?"

"Nah. He's been busy being a good kid lately. I didn't know what had got into him."

Deep inside she wanted to ask the same thing to him, but she didn't, letting the rest of the drive quiet without further talks.

They got off the car. It's a silent agreement that they went to the same mall, going for a café just a few shops away from their first date site. The walk remained quiet that time. No laughter, no twined arms, only dead air and awkward silence.

"I need to smoke, so I'm gonna sit here," he announced, explaining his choice to sit across her, back facing an outdoor area. He knew she hated secondhand smoke. Yet, he decided to continue smoking unlike their first date when no cigarette was lit up.

She just nodded in reply, unreadable expression on her face.

"So, how's it going?" he casually asked after taking a deep inhale of his cigarette as if nothing happened between them.

"Nothing much, just the usual routine of going to uni and back home," she didn't bother to ask back.

"No one to take you out?" he huffed out a cloud of smoke to his side.

She snorted. "I can just go on my own. Not a big deal."

"I'm meeting my friend after this, so maybe I can't stay that long," informed him.

"It's fine," she flashed a smile, another forced one, bitter from his different behavior.

The waitress then served their orders: a cup of coffee for him and a cup of lemon tea for her. She was grateful she didn't order any kind of meal previously since she was sure enough she had lost her appetite after seeing Yuta and his drastic changes.

"So, I have this one friend, a girl," he started off. "Long story short, she's a slut."

The way he spoke was enough to bring another surprise to her. There's no hesitancy at all.

"She has a younger sister, still in high school. We talked and I pity her," he continued.

She was wondering what it had to do with her since she's not interested in his circle of friends anyway.

"She got abandoned by her parents and her sister was too busy dealing with her own life."

"And?" was the only response she could give after a long moment of silence.

"I've been accompanying her in the past few weeks, just being a friend she could talk to. She was suicidal," he sighed.

For the first time, his story earned her full attention as she began to sympathize.

Yuta paused for a while. "She's not any less sluttier than her sister. She in fact learned from her."

There's too much ups and downs already for her, getting a bit too much to take.

"She asked me to sleep with her," he remarked, no single regret shown across his face.

She didn't need to ask what's next to find out the answer. She knew. "Oh," she responded shortly.

"I don't know what to do now. I didn't mean to date her, but it turned out this way."

She secretly took a deep breath. "Well, I guess you better accompany her for a while," she coldly said.

"Right?" he asked for a second approval. "I can't believe I'm doing this actually."

She managed to keep her straight face all the way until she reached her dorm. She just broke down and cried her lungs out after knowing the perfect Yuta in her mind was actually far from the definition itself. It was difficult for her to accept the fact that he went for someone that he even called a slut himself. She tried to sympathize and understand the poor girl's perspective, but she just couldn't. But there was no other choice for her than to wholeheartedly deal with the bitter truth. Yuta chose the girl instead of her.

She was then overwhelmed by another round of regret, the regret of having her hopes too high on Yuta.

* * *

It's been months after the traumatizing talk with Yuta. She had been keeping everything to herself, not a single word of her experience with Yuta ever reached Taeyong. Deep inside, she once wondered if he knew anything, but to her it seemed like Yuta had also distanced himself from Taeyong despite the fact whether it's on purpose or not. From what she knew, they're not more than just classmates as Yuta hung out with his bandmates most of the time.

It was just another boring day for her. Another routine of going to uni and back, once in a while going for a Chinese language course she'd been enrolled since a year before. It was around 7 in the evening when her Chinese class ended. The bustling road in front of her course place welcomed her as soon as she stepped out to the small open space at the front part of the building. It's one of the reasons why she never drove there.

She was about to walk towards the gate when she noticed a familiar figure standing by the entrance to the small café located at the side of the building, gaze focused on his phone screen while sucking on his cigarette. She pretended not to recognize him and casually walked by, but he called her name.

She stopped dead at her track, wishing she misheard it until he called her name again for the second time.

"Yuta?" she acted to be surprised as if it's her first time seeing him. "What are you doing here?"

He put off his cigarette on a nearby ashtray and shoved his phone into the pocket of his jeans. "Hi. Uh, I just happened to be nearby and I remember it's your course schedule. So I stopped by to see you."

She let out an awkward chuckle, "Me?"

He nervously smiled as he looked at her. "Yeah."

"Well, you've seen me already. I hope you don't mind if I excuse myself now," she mindlessly replied.

"Wait," he reflexively held her arm to stop her from going. "Do you mind to have dinner together?" the obvious nervousness when he asked got her frowning.

"Uh," she was considering her decision before he cut her off.

"Please," he said with a hopeful stare.

She shrugged in defeat. "Fine."

She had no idea what's the purpose of having dinner together when they spent the time without any word exchanged. She didn't bother to look at Yuta all along, or more like preventing herself from stupidly falling all over again because of his eyes. To her unknown, he had been stealing glances at her all the time. He received the signal that she's not interested in talking to him anymore and he had no choice but to accept that.

Her course place was just two stations away from her dorm, reachable by a long walk. The dinner place itself was already halfway back that she found it no use for her to take the train when she could just walk for another ten minutes. She was about to part ways with him after the silent dinner when he proposed the idea which she didn't like since the first place.

"I'll walk you home," he announced and began to walk without bothering to wait for her approval.

She hurriedly matched his pace and turned towards him. "No need. You can just take the train directly from here."

Yuta continued walking without sparing a glance at her, so did she. "By the time we stop arguing, we reach your place already."

She sighed at his stubbornness. She let him be and continued walking in silence.

He tailed her all the way until they arrived at her door. He stood still, waiting for her taking out her keycard and unlocking the door.

She had no idea what had got into her, but the words slipped out of her mouth. "Come in."

Yuta was taken aback by the unexpected invitation. He stared at her for a moment until she confirmed it again with her gesture. He followed her inside without a word.

"It's a bit messy," she broke the ice first.

"It's okay," he replied shortly before having a seat on the couch at the corner of her studio-style dorm room. He took off his backpack and hoodie as he watched her doing the same.

She then approached him and occupied the empty space next to him. She let out a sigh after a quick glance at him without saying anything.

He carefully rested his palm on her thigh, causing the memories of their first date flashed back in her mind. "I miss you," he softly said.

Unexpectedly to him, she reached towards his face and stroked his cheek as she slowly turned him to face her. His surprised gaze was staring back at her, for the first time looking fragile. Her frustration took over, leading her to landed her lips on his as she shifted onto his lap, facing him.

He welcomed her by embracing her face, deepening the kiss as his eyes fluttered close. He was busy working his tongue inside her mouth when he felt his t-shirt was being pulled up. He broke the kiss for a moment just to let his t-shirt off before getting back to what he was doing after having a quick look at her face. She took the short break to take off her blouse too, leaving her bra on as the only barrier between their burning skins.

He then wrapped her legs around him and carried her to her bed. Soon after, he found himself being fully occupied by her lips and neck as he gently left marks all the way down towards her cleavage.

"If you want a slut, I can be one too," she said all of a sudden, causing him to halt at her quip.

He raised his head to look at her in disbelief.

"Fuck me now and I will start sleeping with other guys after this so I can win your attention, just like how that slut won against this boring virgin beneath you," she continued.

Yuta was left agape from her words. "I... I never see you that way. There's nothing wrong with you."

"Then why?" she snapped. "Just admit it!"

That was the moment he realized he had made a huge mistake. He stroked her cheek as his lips formed a shaky smile. "There's nothing wrong with you. It's been my problem all along," he trailed off. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way."

She looked away from him, her tears began to wet her cheeks as all the hurtful memories emerged.

Yuta rolled to her side before he carefully sneaked his arm behind her neck to cradle her. He gently cupped her cheek and pulled her to look at him. "You're that girl I've been looking for and it hurts me to know that I'm way far from perfect for you," he confessed. "After our first date, I can't help to feel that I don't deserve you. I was having a hard time distancing myself from you, but I had no other choice. I have to make you hate me if I can't make myself hates you."

She remained silent, watching his eyes turned glassy as he spoke.

"I purposely did everything to make the worst out of me. It was not easy for me to be a jerk in front of you, but I just wanted you to hate me. I wanted you to storm off as you couldn't stand me acting that way, but you stayed there, listening to every single word I told you, you faked a smile at me, and even encouraged me to go for that girl. It hurt more than seeing you leave right away. And I can't stop regretting what I did until now."

"Why?" she asked in a whisper.

"Because I can't stop loving you," he replied. "Seeing you being that happy to spend time with me feels like it's too good to be true, while I can't even fulfill your preferences. Taeyong already warned me that you don't like someone who smokes and drinks heavily, but I didn't listen. I tried to cut it all off during our first week, but I feel like I'm killing myself. That's why I gave up and did all the worst things, back to my old nature. But I already fell too deep for you and I didn't have the courage to end it myself. I thought by being a total jerk in front of you could make you hate me, but it just made everything worse. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," he whimpered.

She buried her face onto the crook of his neck as her arm slowly circled around him.

"Those sluts might win my lust, but they never win my heart. I couldn't feel anything at all whenever I was with them. That's when I realized I already left my heart with you. I really am sorry," he apologized. "The scale of my mistakes hit me hard when you didn't even bother my presence earlier. It hurts more than anything, and I... deserve it."

She planted a quick peck on his jaw. "I can't lie to myself that deep inside I miss you too."

He shifted to his side and faced her. "I just want you to know that I didn't come here to simply spend my lust on you like how I came to those girls. Every single moment I spend with you is meaningful, and I miss that. I want to ask for another chance for me to be a gentleman for you. I can't undo what I've done, but I want to fix it," he proposed. "I know I might be the worst guy you've ever met, but I will use all of the courage I have left in me to ask for a second chance. I want to be a better man for you from now on if you let me."

She rolled herself away from him to reach the drawer of her nightstand, taking a box of sealed condom and handed it to him without saying anything.

His eyes widened, flustered from the unexpected response. "But-"

She caressed his flushed cheek with her thumb as she sincerely smiled at him. "That's your second chance."

He looked down at the box, considering. "It's not that I don't want it, but... are you sure you want it now? I'm-" 

She nodded in reply.

"And... letting me be your first time?" he nervously asked.

She gently left a kiss on his lips before letting out a soft chuckle. "I only want you to be my first time and forever, Yuta. My one and only gentleman deserves the honor."

He embraced her and pulled her close for a deep kiss. "I love you. I promise I won't let you down ever again."

She couldn't help to smile between their kiss. "I love you too, Nakamoto Yuta."


End file.
